Watching Paint Dry is a self-categorized “relax’em up” by David OReilly in which a mountain is generated and you get to look at it. I wish I could stop making these “no, I mean it” intros, but there is really no other way of describing this.


My thoughts exactly.


Mr. OReilly’s Audiovisual Rollercoaster starts by asking you to draw your interpretation of three separate words. Apparently, this data is used to define the shape of your mountain, what grows on it, and what kind of climate is most prevalent. There is no clue to this in the game, I just overheard it in the massive network of plumbing that is the internet, so take it with a kernel of corn.

After this, the only thing you will ever see is a floating mountain, alone in the void of space, with its own atmosphere and climate.


You can do nothing with the mouse AND the keyboard, AT THE SAME TIME.


Apparently there are 50 hours of “gameplay,” and I am told it has an end. Guess who won’t stick around to see it. This has been running in the background for over 6 hours now (apparently it’s designed for just that), and the only interesting thing I’ve noticed is that, for some inexplicable reason, giant objects from space will collide against the mountain, and by that I mean anvils, horses, dice, sailboats, clocks, eggs, jars, and violins, at least so far.



A lone piano key will occasionally signal the appearance of a random thought, and a choral choir will announce the dawn. As far as music goes, that’s it. It rains, it snows, it’s more or less cloudy, the mountain just keeps spinning. You can actually zoom in and out, and rotate the view with the mouse. Considering the controls say otherwise, I’m guessing this is an easter egg.



I don’t think I can attribute a score to this, simply because I don’t think this is a game. Now, of course, we could delve into a debate over what makes a game a game, and what implications defining such a concept has to the future of gaming and its influence on society, but we won’t, because I don’t really care. It’s just a bloody mountain.

Accept the mystery.


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